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  I quickly stand up and pull my pants back up over my ass.

  “If you can just take a seat again, we can proceed,” he says.

  I have no idea how to read this guy. Doctor Firm Dick is standing here with a complete erection…an erection he had even before I stupidly showed him my ass. And now that erection is even bigger and thicker, but his professionalism seems to be growing too. When he entered the room his tone seemed more casual at first, but now he’s all business.

  These hot and cold signals are confusing the heck out of me.

  I hate that I practically feel like I’m throwing myself at him, even though I wasn’t trying to, but damn…can he make up his mind as to if he wants to be professional or not?

  “Of course not,” I say.

  I sit on the edge of edge of the table and he moves in closer to me.

  It’s one thing to see how big he is from a few feet away. It’s entirely another when he’s standing right next to you and he’s towering over you. I swear he’s at least twice as wide as me…his shoulders seem more like three times as wide.

  I can feel his warmth in the cool room and it makes my neck tingle.

  And then I feel his hands against my skin.

  His grip is firm but not overbearing on my arm which he makes feel like a twig in those big mitts of his.

  He’s barely gripping me yet he has complete control over me. I feel intimidated by his size and turned on at the same time. Very, very turned on.

  “You’re going to feel a bee sting in three…”

  He pinches my skin and pokes me before he says two. I feel the needle release the fluid inside the back of my arm and suddenly I feel even warmer.

  “All done,” he says.

  “Thank you,” I say. “Sorry to cause you trouble. I had this shot years ago, but I lost those records and I’m going to a place with such a high infection rate so it made sense to get revaccinated. Plus it was required.”

  “What is your goal with this program?”

  “I want to help people and eventually do what you do one day.”

  “What I do?” he asks.

  “Yeah, I mean maybe not at the same level…you’re very successful from what I’m gather, but something like this. Helping people in very stressful situations. It must be a rush saving people’s lives.”

  “It’s a rush alright,” he says.

  He still hasn’t moved. I’m not sure what to do so I stand up, but I don’t go anywhere.

  Now his body is directly next to mine.

  “You may need additional shots,” he says. “I’d have to take a look at the books.”

  “Additional shots?”

  “That’s right.” Is he trying to keep me from leaving? Trying to extend our time together? “I went on a trip through Brazil a couple years ago. Part of it was in the Amazon region. I needed more vaccinations than I initially expected. Even hepatitis for the possibility of what I’d come in contact with in the water.”

  “You swam in the Amazon? Aren’t there---“

  “Crocodiles there? Not exactly. More like caiman. But you can actually surf the Amazon now. Guys have been doing it for over a decade now.”

  “You surfed the Amazon?”

  “I did. There are some waves there that you can ride for twenty minutes straight. It’s a long, smooth ride and it’s very satisfying. It really brings out the animal inside you.”

  “Long? Smooth? The animal inside?”

  “Animal instincts. You never feel so alive as when you’re close to death. Seeing those caiman lying along the side of the bank knowing if I wipe out they’ll be coming for me right away. Knowing that if I make one wrong move everything I worked for could be completely…gone.”

  “But you didn’t make a wrong move?”

  “No I didn’t,” he says. I feel my body slide closer to his and his inch closer to mine. And it’s not just our bodies, it’s our faces.

  “But I wanted to.”

  “You wanted to make a wrong move?”

  “I wanted to take some more chances. A smooth steady ride is fun, but I wanted to be more aggressive and try different things…different maneuvers…different positions.”

  “Different maneuvers? Different positions?”

  “Positions I knew about but never tried before. You never know if that will be your one and only chance,” he says. “You know what I mean.”

  “I know what you…”

  I look up and see him looking down right at me.

  I raise up on my tip toes and watch as he leans in closer.

  My eyes close and my lips pucker reading to feel his lips on mine before we try some maneuvers and positions.

  I feel his breath on my mouth and my heart rate beats even faster. I can feel his lips are just an inch or two away.

  Suddenly the door slams open.

  “Doc—. Sorry,” the nurse says as she quickly closes the door.

  I come down off my tip toes and he pulls back.

  The moment is lost, for now at least.

  But now that I’ve come this close I need to go the rest of the way.

  And by that I mean all the way.

  CHAPTER 7

  Doctor Church

  I can’t believe I almost lost my professionalism in there.

  First you lose your professionalism, and then you lose your medical license.

  It was the first time I was ever glad Jane interrupted me…or was I?

  God, I wanted to feel her soft lips against mine.

  I wanted to grab her and pull her in close feeling her body pressed against mine. When I squeezed her arm I imagined all the things I could do to her. I could toss her around like a rag doll all night long.

  And that’s exactly what I want to do…but not first.

  First I want to enjoy every single inch of her. Take my time and really get to know her body. I’ll run my hands along every square inch that I’ll have a mental map in my mind I can pull up anytime she’s not around and just please myself to later.

  But I can’t do that when it comes to her. When I want her I have to have her, not the idea of her no matter how vivid it is.

  And I could see she wanted it too. But she’s so young and it makes me wonder.

  Has she been with a man before?

  Has she even been with a boy her own age before?

  Girls that travel overseas to help people in need are good girls by definition. She’s probably not afraid of the human body, but I bet she’ll be scared of what I’ve got in my pants for her. It scares me and it’s mine!

  I don’t ever remember my dick being so hard, so long, and so needy. And it’s all because of her and there’s no way I’m going to be able to think about anything until I have her.

  But I can’t here. Not at the office. I’m a professional no matter how difficult that is right now. I’ve got to maintain my composure.

  How am I going to make this work?

  I’m not about to use my position to try and put this girl in a position she doesn’t want to be in. She has to want it. To want me. Not just the idea of me as a big, powerful doctor but the real me.

  And in order to want the real me I have to show it to her. It’s the only way.

  But I’m short on time and I’ve barely slept.

  It doesn’t matter.

  This is a once in a lifetime opportunity. She’s a once in a lifetime opportunity.

  Think, Church. Think.

  Jane came in to tell me the night nurses were here for the switch over. That’s sorted so Jane will be going home soon. The night nurses will just sit in the back and keep an eye on the patient’s recovery process. She’s doing great and there is no need to even worry about complications, but I am a professional. I can’t leave the city…not tonight. If something does happen I need to be close enough that I can get here on my bike.

  But the girl. The girl whose name I still don’t even know.

  She wants to learn about medicine? She wants to be a doctor? And I need to show her the
real me?

  Damn, I’ve never done this before but there’s only one way.

  I know she’s real and I want to be real with her. She’s too young to be an experienced game player like those women out in the Hamptons. With her what you see is what you get.

  It’s a fresh perspective in this city that never sleeps. Everybody trying to get somewhere other than where they are to meet someone other than who they’re with.

  I’m so over that.

  She’s young. She bright. She’s a breath of fresh air.

  And that’s exactly what I’ll give her…a breath of fresh air.

  Very fresh air.

  CHAPTER 8

  Matilda

  I hold on tight as he rounds the corkscrew turn. I didn’t even know they had streets like this in New York.

  As we come out of the turn he taps me on the outside of my thigh and I grab on even tighter than I was before. He told me to be ready when he tapped me and I am.

  We start to drop speed and I wonder why he’s decelerating when I’m expecting more and more action.

  And then I find out why.

  I feel my entire body tip back until I’m at a forty-five degree angle…but this time in the other direction.

  The bike is almost completely vertical as we glide down the street. Smoke bellows out of the dual exhaust and I feel like I’m getting the most intense roller coaster ride ever…except this one has no line, no fee, and is completely real.

  The bike drops forward again and he throttles the gas sending us flying down the road.

  I doubt what we did was legal and I doubt it was safe, but I don’t doubt one bit that I need a new pair of panties right now.

  Feeling the rumble of the bike between my legs and the way he handles it as I get to feel his body as we ride is the ultimate turn on…mentally, physically, and emotionally.

  This guy is the baddest of the bad asses and he’s a doctor. How is that even possible?

  I thought doctors bought boats and sat around during their off time and talked about sailing around the Caribbean. Not this guy. Not Dr. Church.

  And even though we can’t talk now due to the helmets, the wind, and the speed it’s the words he said to me just before I walked out of that office that convinced me to take this ride with him.

  “What’s your why?” he had asked.

  “What?” I said.

  He went on to explain why everyone needs a “why”. For many it’s just money. For some it’s just wanting to help others. He asked me what my why is and I told him. He told me my answer wasn’t good enough. It didn’t make him feel and to be a great doctor you have to have passion and something driving you internally.

  He said it’s usually there, but if not you have to find it yourself. And it has to be real. You can’t fool people and the easiest person to fool is yourself.

  You can’t say you want to help when you really just want to make a boatload of money. It will never work. Sure, you may get rich, but you’ll never achieve what you set out to achieve and all that money will be a hollow victory, if a victory at all.

  I never met someone who challenged me like that, especially just after meeting me.

  I was intrigued…impressed…curious.

  He told me he’d never shown anyone his why. He said it was too personal, but he said there was something about me that told him it was time to share his why…with me.

  I was completely honored, especially considering he was much more than I expected. A cursory Google search sent me to his door by chance. Now that I was “in” I had to do everything I could to stay there.

  And I knew a guy like this had all the choices in the world. Most guys would give their left arm just to have dinner with his receptionist, and he looked at her as if she was nothing special…at least in terms of her physical beauty.

  I could only imagine the kind and quality of women this guy attracts, and catches, but does he keep them?

  And what makes me think I can be the one?

  I must be crazy, and accepting this ride on the back of his bike doesn’t do much to disprove my own thoughts.

  But he did give me a helmet and took a few minutes to explain how to move my body with his…not that I needed much help.

  Everything came so naturally. I always thought riding a motorcycle was such an aggressive, testosterone-filled man’s game, but he showed me it was a dance.

  A dance between man and machine and when I was involved that only doubled. It was a dance between the two of us. A silent dance in terms of words, but not in terms of power coming from the exhaust and the rumble in between my thighs.

  As he moved my body naturally followed. The angle we took through turns was breathtaking and my first inclination was to lean the other way. To turn away from danger. But as he’d explained beforehand I followed his lead and leaned into the danger, which was actually the safest move.

  Counterintuitive? Completely. But that summed him up to a T. A tatted up doctor with a big bank account and an even bigger dick.

  Leather boat shoes? Hardly. Leather biker jacket? Definitely.

  He was the complete opposite of what I expected a doctor to be and even more opposite of any guy I ever could have dreamed I’d be interested in.

  I thought I wanted a guy I could cuddle with on the couch and watch movies with. How wrong I was. I mean sure those things were great, but they didn’t get my blood flowing like Dr. Church.

  And just when I think my blood can’t pump any harder he drops the gears down and turns into a parking lot.

  I see a sign for a hospital and wonder what exactly he’s going to show me.

  His why…and why he chose the profession in the first place.

  And why he chose to show me this now.

  CHAPTER 9

  Doctor Church

  I escort Matilda into the emergency room entrance. I got her name before we left the office. I had to know and I sure am glad I do now.

  Her name is so unique. It sounds classic, just like her beauty. I image that name being attached to a piano player in a grand concert hall or maybe a stage actress from Europe, but no. It’s just a simple girl from a simple place, and that makes it all the better.

  It may not seem like it, but I don’t like complicated. Complicated is only good when it’s hidden in the background and makes the simple even easier. Technology as a tool, I always think to myself.

  And when it comes to being simple I’m the king, even though I’ve never wanted to share this with anyone before.

  “This is the emergency room?” Matilda asks.

  “It is, but it’s so much more than that.”

  Nurse Karen smiles at me as she passes us in the hallway.

  Nurse Kelly stops and gives me a quick kiss on the cheek. I have to bend down and she uses the opportunity to run her fingers through my hair.

  Neither says a word. They don’t have to. The work they’re doing here speaks volumes.

  I can see Matilda is confused at what’s happening, and that’s far from my intention.

  “I was born here,” I say.

  “They have a delivery room?”

  “No, but they have an emergency room.”

  “But,” she begins. I raise my finger to her lips, finally making contact with them after my previous attempt back at my clinic. I wish it were my lips against hers, but at least my finger is a start.

  And just as I expected they are so soft and subtle. They’re beyond distracting, but I need to stay focused.

  “My mother…was a prostitute.” I pause. There’s no point in sugar coating it. “She was shot when she was over eight and a half months pregnant.”

  “I’m so, so sorry,” Matilda says.

  “It was way before your time…before you were born. This ER used to service one of the lowest income areas in the city. Since then things have gotten better. The area and my life.”

  I see she’s processing my words trying to dig deeper for the meaning. I know if I want to go deeper with her I have to co
ntinue.

  “The doctor on call that night, or should I say that morning since it was 2:30 by that point, induced labor. Through some sort of miracle I survived. My mother wasn’t so lucky.”